Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Game Over....with an update

Before I even started. I'm so stunned, I can't believe it.

I have not heard officially from Top Doc's clinic, but it's a no go. Call it a cyst. Call it a dominant follicle. Call it the pile of shit for a body that I live in. I know I am cancelled before I even start the stims tonight. Yes, I realize I got my medical degree from Goo.gle University, but Dr. OMC saw it on the u/s this morning and called it out. Of course, with the disclaimer that it's not HIS final call.

I did not go to the pharmacy.
I am cancelling my hotel.
I am calling for a refund.
I am writing off the month of September.
I am losing my fucqing mind. Again.

Top Doc called this afternoon to say she wants me to have another u/s on Thursday. She thinks this monster follicle could be a remnant of the last cycle and may be on its way out. Since it.is.so.fucqing.huge. (Well that's not the descriptive word she used, but you get it.) I still like her, by the way. She delivers even shitty news with integrity.


  1. Oh I'm sorry. This sort of shit just shouldn't happen. I'm so very sorry. Thinking of you.

  2. Oh shit, I am so, so sorry. Thinking of you.

  3. Crap. I'm hoping your next ultrasound gives you some better news.

  4. I hate that you're feeling this way. I hate bad news. I hate plans that get driven into a ditch. I just want so badly for you to have a REAL shot at this. I'm hoping the cyst is a follicle remnant. I had one of those at the very outset of my first cycle. And it went away. They drew blood to see if it was producing progesterone and then they let me continue on my way. So I hope the same is true for you.

  5. ugh....hoping that thursday brings better news....bleh.

  6. Oh babe, so sorry. Here's hoping Thursday brings those odd IVF turn around days - when what you thought was going to happen is the opposite what actually happens.

  7. I'm so sorry. Cancellation really sucks. Been there, done that. Could she aspirate the cyst and save the cycle. I think I've heard of people doing that. When I was cancelled for a cyst it was pumping out estrogen and apparently that was bad? Anyway...my cyst went away and I was able to cycle again relatively quickly.

    Good luck!

  8. Goddarngit K. I was in EXACTLY the same situation last month and it sucks eggs big time. Damned huge cyst/follicle/whatevah. If I am cancelled before I begin in this one, I am getting in my car with a case of wine and a bag of the best imported pasta (I covet your jars of fresh garden pesto). Then I'm knocking on every door down the coast until I find you.

  9. me too! this is what happened to me this month
    hope your scan today showed something good (also known as nothing big)-- and that you can get on with this. So so sorry that this is not the smooth cycle I wished for you,