Sunday, June 28, 2009

Threes Come In Pairs

Yep, we did it again. DIY IUI # 3. With the brand name OPKs this time. Super Doc said this was the 'best' one yet....meaning easy, highest percentage of contents transferred, and minimal discomfort. So there you have it.

Non-coincidentally I assume, I had a dream last night about my future consult with opinion #3 (scheduled for next month). If you're the superstitious type, then you'd be running to schedule the appointment with opinion #2 based on the foreshadow that occurred. In any case, I'll give #3 the benefit of the doubt and wait for the consult before I play judge and jury.

All of this seems so "last year" compared to Sprog's most outstanding news. If you're new to this planet and have not been 'graced' with Sprog's writings (pun intended), then you must run (not walk) and check out her news.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

When Pagans Whisper

Every now and then there are days I never want to end. I can count on one at least once a year. June 21st - the solstice. There is always magic that day. The sun sets so late...the honeysuckle is in full bloom, the lavender is intoxicating, and the air is ripe with the official onset of summer (though summer arrived in May this year). I love that day. I love not wearing shoes. I love that the first garden harvests are around the corner.

But here I am....back on this planet, where it's no big surprise that DIY IUI #2 didn't work. And it's no big secret that I've been a bit (ok maybe a lot) depressed. Tried to have a few IF-free days....days I wasn't on the internet (thanks you guys, for saying Hi anyway)....days I wasn't consumed with what my body was doing or not doing...days where I found other things to distract me. Eight graduations, 3 birthdays, 2 weddings, 1 funeral, and a partridge in a pear tree this month helped...or not, depending on how you look at it.

But in and among all of this mess, some nasty little abdominal thing crept up. I managed to fight off Super Doc and avoided the ER one night, but went through 2 full days of testing last week. Got some really nice bloodwork done. (Managed to sneak in another FSH, E2, TSH just for shits and giggles, hoping the insurance won't catch it among a slew of other tests). Everything looked good, except for my liver. Then I got an abdominal CT (clear), followed by a GI consult. So what's the verdict? Nothing yet, and it means I get a hose down my throat next week. Yep. Endoscopy. Nice. They've ruled out pancreatitis and some other stuff. It's likely a big fat stomach ulcer (gee, I wonder why), IBS (big surprise), or disease (very unlikely). I had my gallbladder removed 3 years ago, so that's out. So the GI doc is going to throw the scope down me and take a peek. I'm so excited I could vomit.

So Mr. GI thinks the IVF and/or its drugs may have pissed my liver off too. Interesting. I quit taking my herbs. Quit the D.HEA. And quit just about everything else, except for this little blue designer stomach pill. So I'm in a holding pattern again, just trying to get myself well. Still planning to do another cycle one of these days. Still planning to get my shit back together.


But in the land of interesting news....a new IF clinic has opened in my town. That makes #4. So the plot thickens, so to speak. We shall see what this new development brings.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Would you believe....

...I might be an idiot? .....that the cheap-o grocery store brand of OPK is just that - cheapo? ...that just for shits and giggles I did another OPK test? ....that it was, without a doubt, a positive LH surge today??

And so I texted Super Doc to be sure and swing into the hospital and snag some more utensils for DIY IUI 2.1. His response....WTF? He witnessed the fading, almost extinct lines in successive days himself. And so, the moral of the story friends....don't buy the cheapy brands.

All 8's

Meinsideout tagged me with Crazy 8s a few days ago, so I'm finallly getting around to doing it. And yes, it is nice to think about other things.

Rules: Mention the person that tagged me, complete the list of 8’s, and tag 8 bloggers.
(Disclaimer: I reserve the right to copy a few...)

8 Things I’m Looking Forward To:

1. Leaving for vacation tomorrow
2. Losing my IVF weight eventually
3. Getting – and staying – pregnant someday (I think we both copied this from Sprog)
4. More hot days to lay by the pool
5. My friend's retirement from teaching next week (yes, many of my friends are THAT old)
6. An end to this nasty legal battle hanging over our heads
7. An uptick in the economy by the end of the year
8. knocking out honey-do lists around the house

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. Nursed an old herniated disk with ice packs
2. Did some accounting work for Mr. W's office (flat on my back of course)
3. Wondered where the Air Fr.ance plane went down and why
4. Emailed clients (had to pretend I was working!)
5. Listened to En.ya
6. Tried to keep cool without turning on the A/C
7. Did more research on clinics (it's like beating a dead horse...)
8. Read all of your blogs. :)

8 Things I Wish I Could Do:

1. Lose more weight
2. Get pregnant
3. Make my cats not get older (stolen from you, Meinsideout)
4. Get my someday vineyard planted and start making wine
5. Move to Italy
6. Meet some of my bloggy friends
7. Have more meaningful relationships with the friends I have
8. Play the piano (better)

8 Shows I Watch: (This is hard, don't watch much TV.)

1. Iron Ch.ef America
2. House hunters international
3. CN.BC power lunch
4. Sopranos (reruns)
5. Everyday Italian
6. Chel.sey Lately (ok, it's my one excuse for sleeze TV)
7. Discovery channel stuff
8. Nig.htly News with Brian Will.iams

8 Favorite Fruits:

1. Raspberries
2. Blackberries
3. Cantaloupe
4. Avocados (technically a fruit)
5. Tomatoes (also technically a fruit)
6. White peaches
7. Red Grapes
8. Bananas

8 Places I’d Like to Travel: (It doesn't say it has to be a new place!)

1. Italy
2. France
3. Russia
4. Dubai
5. Washington DC
6. Queen Charlotte/Prince Rupert Canada
7. Martha's Vineyard
8. New England during fall

8 Places I’ve Lived:

1. Washington
2. Oregon
3. California
4. Ohio
5. small college town
6. big cities
7. big city suburbs
8. coastal town

8 People I’m Tagging:

Barefoot and (Not) Pregnant
Best When Used By
can you imagine?
Grade A
I can't whistle
IVF 40+ Path to Parenthood
The Angry Infertile
What IF?

Monday, June 1, 2009

Buying Time

Welcome to the new look. Boredom with the old look crept in, much the way I find myself getting bored playing the IF game. It doesn't help that I am horizontal nursing an old herniated disk that I managed to aggrivate for no apparent reason. So with the back on ice, and kitty #2 draped across me, I can monkey with the blog.

To keep things interesting, we pulled off another DIY'er although I think I totally blew it. I wasn't paying close enough attention to the OPK and think I missed it by a day. Which either means we missed the DIY IUI by two days, or we just snuck it in under that magical little 24 hour PO window. A window that probably doesn't even exist in my house. So I can pretty much guarantee this one was a write-off, although Super Doc is getting pretty damn good at it now!

The hard part is what to do next. We are leaving for vacation in 2 days and I'm hoping some time away will allow the best answer to present itself. We are trying to choose a new clinic. And I'm looking at the calendar. All of the likely candidates for start dates have serious obstacles in them, conveniently around potential retrieval dates. And I still haven't chosen a clinic. Damn. I have to get my act together but I feel like I don't even know where to start. I feel like time's a wastin, but I really want to drop more than 7 of the 25 pounds I gained on the last round and a half. Time (and timing) is just everything....and no matter how hard I try, I just can't buy it.